Many people raised me. My parents were the “tough love” kind and lived the “teacher life.” My parents were also my first teachers. They taught me right from wrong, they were consistent, displayed a united front, and guided me with boundaries. They also warned me there “were many eyes in the neighborhood,” so I couldn’t get away with much. I never really knew what “it takes a village” meant while I was growing up until I became a member of the community as a primary school teacher. Then I had my kids. Then I realized there was NO WAY I could do this by myself. I NEEDED people!
Parents Are Their Children’s First Teachers
I was a teacher before I was a mom. When I became a mom of a child with special needs, I realized what “taking a village” really meant. I was lucky to have a whole army of people who supported me through the early stages of motherhood, but as time passed, I started to get the hang of it. I learned the value of teaching my children right from wrong. Trust me, it was no picnic. It kept me up nights, I cried a lot, and the thought of keeping it together one more day paralyzed me sometimes. But then I started to see my hard work paying off.
Nothing beat the first time I was able to have a drink with my friends while my little ones were finally asleep in their playpen upstairs in a spare room. This small victory didn’t happen right away, though. It took multiple visits to our friend’s house, staying in playing poker, and not letting the little ones convince us that it wasn’t bedtime. We took turns sitting outside the door, not letting them leave their bed to come downstairs. We played music in the bedroom, slideshows on a computer, and never wavered from our post outside the bedroom. Eventually, those kiddos knew it was bedtime and gave up the fight. A small victory that lasted. Finally, we were able to leave our children anywhere, bring them along for a sleepover, and still know we could relax and have fun with our friends.
It Takes a Village to Raise Good Humans
I like to think of my classroom students as “my kids.” In teacher life, we all think of any children we interact with as ours. They are our future like Whitney Houston used to sing about. And what I see in schools now has me a little scared! That’s why there are other options for education for your children.
What I’m seeing as a teacher is “the tail wagging the dog.” What happened to respect for authority? I can tell you if I EVER got into any kind of trouble at school, my parents would side with the teacher before they even heard my side. These days, I would get accusatory emails from parents based on what a 6-year-old would tell them. Ever play “Telephone” with your friends? It’s like that, except usually I’m not smiling by the end of the game. I shouldn’t have had to defend myself to parents when I was the professional teaching their children, yet I often had to. I understand kids get upset. But parents, please just ask the teacher what happened first before jumping to any conclusions. It makes things go much smoother for everyone.
Parents, please know you and your children’s teachers are a team. We all want what’s best for our children. That’s why I did what I did. I treated my classroom of kiddos like a family…like a little community. We helped each other be the best we could be while making mistakes and learning from them. We helped each other with reminders. I taught the difference between “tattling” and “telling,” and I never tolerated disrespect. I taught children to speak up, advocating for themselves, instead of going home and telling their parents they were being “bullied” by an innocent first grader who just hadn’t learned social skills yet.
We Are a Team
If we all work together, our “village” can thrive. I was extremely lucky to work with a team of teachers who would reprimand my students, just like I would for them. The children in our building knew they couldn’t get away with certain things knowing there are multiple sets of eyes on them. That’s how it should be as parents. We shouldn’t feel offended when someone points out our children’s flaws. We should feel supported. Find your support system here. Because NO CHILDREN are perfect. They are constantly learning, and we need to help them be their best, so they can be wonderful, contributing members of society. Isn’t that our goal as parents?
Find your “tribe.” Work together, not against each other. Tough Love really works. Children aren’t always going to love what we do. We all want to live in peace with our children, who at times, can act like little savages, let’s be honest. But if we keep in mind that we all want our children to thrive in this world, then we can use our village to our advantage. Lean on each other and win the little battles of parenting. We all will be better for it.
Help a Teacher or Be a Teacher.
Check out this incredible new way of helping your children learn and grow in the future of education. It is school coming into the comfort of your own home, run by qualified and dedicated teachers. I left the public school system to try new things, but also because I’m sustaining the joy of teaching in a new way. While I’ll always be living the teacher life, I look forward to using my skills in new ways while being productive. Are you a teacher or know a teacher? Give them this amazing opportunity to benefit the future of our children. This is groundbreaking and we are building a new future for our children.
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